Busy is the new fine.
What does that mean? Imagine a typical conversation…
“Hi Charlotte, how’re you?”
“Hey Saavon, I’m fine. I’ve been sooooo busy lately!”
Agh! These words have become placeholders that block us from a more intentional way of living. Life can be hectic at times, I get it. If you answer “busy” to the question “how’re you?” on a daily basis, take a deep breath, step back from the busy-ness and reassess.
You don’t have to be busy. Seriously. There are subtle signs around us that tell us we have to push, hustle and cram as much into our lives as possible in order to be happy and productive, but often the opposite is true.
More work, more money, more stuff and more social commitments to keep up with everyone else’s pace. I’m exhausted just thinking about it.
It’s ok to say no or turn down a social invitation. It may feel like the scariest thing in the world, but do you know what lies on the other side of saying no when you need to? Freedom. Freedom to choose activities and moments that fill you up and make you happy, rather than committing to things to stay busy for fear of letting people down or looking lazy.
The people that are meant to be in our lives will support us when we say no because it’s best for ourselves and our health. It can be a true test of friendships and relationships, but your best people should never guilt or shame you for doing what’s best for you.
You have every right to make time for what lights you up and makes you happy!
Try committing to a bit less on your official calendar and leave some space for rest and activities that you can never quite seem to get to. It’s amazing how so many people know how beneficial meditation or exercise is, yet they can’t find time in their schedules for 5-10 minutes to practice.
I realized after writing that last sentence that it may come across as judgemental or rude. I promise you, that is not the intention behind it. I really believe every freakin’ person in the world should meditate, but I’m not here to shame anybody into it!
Think of it more as a gentle challenge. A small nudge for you to take a few minutes, step back from your life, take stock of what’s going on and then take action. Busy is a choice, but you can choose differently.
Often we get busy, head down in the grind and forget how powerful our choices are in our own lives. Life is not merely happening to us, we have a hand in crafting it.
Is there anything you wish you could do, but can’t find the time because you’re always so busy? How much of your life/calendar is filled with things that you do because you think you “should” be doing? Are you worried if you’re not busy all the time people will think you’re lazy or selfish? You can break this cycle. It’s your choice.
Not being busy does not make you lazy or selfish. Nope, not one bit!
Rest is important. Quiet, reflective time is important. Silly, fun and indulgent times are important. We need it. When we don’t make time for ourselves our bodies let us know by sending signals. What kind of signals? Aches, pains, dis-ease. When we ignore these signals? We get sicker. It’s a vicious cycle.
When we get busy and fill our lives with things that we don’t even care that much about, we’re wasting valuable time.
Here's a great journal exercise:
Write a list of anything that makes you happy. People you love being around, activities that bring you joy, health and vibrancy. Next write down a list of what fills your days, what you spend the most time doing in a week.
Then reflect on the two sets of answers. Is there any overlap? If not, can you make room by minimizing the “should do” list with the “makes me feel like yaaaaas!” list?
This exercise is simple, but powerful. It can help take you out of auto-pilot and reinforce the fact your life is a set of choices that you ultimately get to decide on. When you take ownership of your choices, you can craft your ideal life
Did you try this quick exercise? If you did, share in the comments below one person or activity you’re going to make more time for, I’m excited to hear about all the great stuff you’re going to choose to do!